Life in the 1500s.

I wonder how much of this is apocryphal:

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn’t just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500’s:

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and still smelled pretty good by June. However, they were starting to smell, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, ‘Don’t throw the baby out with the Bath water.’

Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof. Hence the saying, ‘It’s raining cats and dogs.’

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That’s how canopy beds came into existence.

The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, ‘Dirt poor’.

The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed across the lower part of the doorway. Hence, ‘a thresh hold’.

(Getting quite an education, aren’t you?)

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme, ‘Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old’.

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, ‘bring home the bacon’. They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and ‘chew the fat’.

Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the ‘upper crust’.

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive. So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the …graveyard shift.) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be ‘saved by the bel, or was considered a ‘dead ringer’.

And that’s the truth…Now, whoever said History was boring?

The Polity Books

v:* { BEHAVIOR: url(#default#VML) } o:* { BEHAVIOR: url(#default#VML) } w:* { BEHAVIOR: url(#default#VML) } .shape { BEHAVIOR: url(#default#VML) } @font-face { font-family: Cambria Math; } @font-face { font-family: Calibri; } @font-face { font-family: Tahoma; } @page Section1 {size: 612.0pt 792.0pt; margin: 72.0pt 72.0pt 72.0pt 72.0pt; } P.MsoNormal { FONT-SIZE: 11pt; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; FONT-FAMILY: “Calibri”,”sans-serif” } LI.MsoNormal { FONT-SIZE: 11pt; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; FONT-FAMILY: “Calibri”,”sans-serif” } DIV.MsoNormal { FONT-SIZE: 11pt; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; FONT-FAMILY: “Calibri”,”sans-serif” } A:link { COLOR: blue; TEXT-DECORATION: underline; mso-style-priority: 99 } SPAN.MsoHyperlink { COLOR: blue; TEXT-DECORATION: underline; mso-style-priority: 99 } A:visited { COLOR: purple; TEXT-DECORATION: underline; mso-style-priority: 99 } SPAN.MsoHyperlinkFollowed { COLOR: purple; TEXT-DECORATION: underline; mso-style-priority: 99 } P.MsoAcetate { FONT-SIZE: 8pt; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; FONT-FAMILY: “Tahoma”,”sans-serif”; mso-style-priority: 99; mso-style-link: “Balloon Text Char” } LI.MsoAcetate { FONT-SIZE: 8pt; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; FONT-FAMILY: “Tahoma”,”sans-serif”; mso-style-priority: 99; mso-style-link: “Balloon Text Char” } DIV.MsoAcetate { FONT-SIZE: 8pt; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; FONT-FAMILY: “Tahoma”,”sans-serif”; mso-style-priority: 99; mso-style-link: “Balloon Text Char” } SPAN.EmailStyle17 { COLOR: windowtext; FONT-FAMILY: “Calibri”,”sans-serif”; mso-style-type: personal-compose } SPAN.BalloonTextChar { FONT-FAMILY: “Tahoma”,”sans-serif”; mso-style-priority: 99; mso-style-link: “Balloon Text”; mso-style-name: “Balloon Text Char” } .MsoChpDefault { mso-style-type: export-only } DIV.Section1 { page: Section1 } I just got an email from someone who was reading Hilldiggers and wanted to know which books precede it. I often get asked about which book fits where so here, so I can copy a link rather than type out the list each time, is the chronology and order of the books in each series:

Prador Moon

The Shadow of the Scorpion (young Cormac)

The Cormac Series:
1) Gridlinked
2) The Line of Polity
3) Brass Man
4) Polity Agent
5) Line War

The Spatterjay Series:
1) The Skinner
2) The Voyage of the Sable Keech
3) Orbus

Hilldiggers

The Gabble — a collection of short stories set throughout the above chronology.

And here’s where they all fit in the dateline:

2050 – 2250 Expansion into the solar system. Corporate wars and many generation ships, or early U-space drive ships sent on their way. Also the AI takeover of human affairs, in the ‘Quiet War’. Colony ship to Cull in this time.2130 – Hoop and crew arrive on Spatterjay (mutiny – stolen ship)
2150 – Establishing of Golem series and Cybercorp.
2151 – Algin Tenkian born on Mars.
2190 – Skaidon interfaces with AI and invents the technology leading to the runcible and more efficient U-space engines. Humanity expands into the galaxy.
2260 – First runcible goes online.
2260 – 2350 Massive human expansion into the galaxy.
2348 – Beginning of the Prador Third Kingdom
2339 – Ian Cormac born
2310 – Prador Moon
2310 – 2350 Prador/Human war (Prador Moon)
2350 – Polity police action on Spatterjay.
2356 – Keech is killed hunting Alphed Rimsc
2407 – Disappearance of Dragon from Aster Colora.
2432 – Destruction of the Samarkand runcible.
2434 – Arrival of Hubris at Samarkand (Gridlinked)
2437 – Destruction of Outlink station Miranda (The Line of Polity)
2441 – Pursuit of Skellor (Brass Man)
2443 – Tracing the cource of Jain nodes (Polity Agent)
2444 – Attack of melded entity Erebus (Line War)
2450 – Gosk Balem (Ambel) thrown into the sea – 100 years after war.
2500 – David McGrooger born
2550 – Keech finds Corbel Frane on Viridian – 500 years before
2803 – Polity arrives at Spatterjay to establish runcible base
2853 – Frisk hands herself in (apparently). – 200 years before
2878 – Bloc murdered by Aesop and Bones
3056 – Keech Janer and Erlin arrive on Spatterjay (The Skinner)
3078 – Taylor Bloc’s ship launches (The Voyage of the Sable Keech)
3079 – Orbus sets out (Orbus)
3230 – McCrooger arrives at Bromal and Sudoria (Hilldiggers)

Hope this helps!

BFPO 2006

Here’s the last few post transferred over from my website.

7th February 2006 Just back from a few days in Berlin. The incredibly low temperatures there were an experience not to be missed in themselves (check out one picture in the gallery). Neither of us have seen a river frozen over, for real, for longer than we can remember. We also took a look at the Reichstag, the Brandenberg Gate, Checkpoint Charlie and the museum there. We rode around on the trams, U-bahn, S-bahn all of which were cheaper, more efficient and cleaner than anything found in Britain. Another impressive aspect of Berlin, which I hope applies to all of Germany, was how polite and helpful people were. We only had to stop for a few minutes to study a map before someone approached us to ask if they could be of any help — something you don’t see happening in London. Hannes Riffel, an SF bookshop owner there was a very nice guy to meet, too. He is obviously enthusiastic and knowledgeable about his trade and all things science fiction & fantasy, and keeps an excellent selection on his shelves. Go there, buy there!
19th February 2006
Well, The Voyage of the Sable Keech was launched on the 16th and of course far too much beer was consumed. Thanks to Macmillan for the hospitality. Also my thanks to the guys at the Forbidden Planet Bookshop in London for having me along for a signing session, which seemed to go very well. Now here’s you chance to win some copies of said book, and others, and to play the Sable Keech game! http://www.panmacmillan.com/sablekeech/
1st October 2006 All within two weeks and a nice start to the new year: My short story Mason’s Rats has been taken by David G Hartwell & Kathryne Cramer for their Year’s Best SF 11, and I’ve since been contacted by Gardner Dozois who wants another story published in Asimov’s — Softly Spoke the Gabbleduck — for his ‘Year’s Best’ anthology. And now I discover I’ve made it to the shortlist of the Philip K Dick Award.

New Space Opera 2.

With publication time coming soonish, and with the information already out, here’s the final table of contents for The New Space Opera 2.

1. “Utriusque Cosmi”, Robert Charles Wilson
2. “The Island”, Peter Watts
3. “Events Preceding the Helvetican Renaissance”, John Kessel
4. “To Go Boldly”, Cory Doctorow
5. “The Lost Princess Man”, John Barnes
6. “Defect”, Kristine Kathryn Rusch
7. “To Raise A Mutiny Betwixt Yourselves”, Jay Lake
8. “Shell Game”, Neal Asher
9. “Punctuality”, Garth Nix
10. “Inevitable”, Sean Williams
11. “Join The Navy and See the Worlds”, Bruce Sterling
12. “Fearless Space Pirates of the Outer Rings”, Bill Willingham
13. “From the Heart”, John Meaney
14. “Chameleons”, Elizabeth Moon
15. “The Tenth Muse”, Tad Williams
16. “Cracklegrackle”, Justina Robson
17. “The Tale of the Wicked”, John Scalzi
18. “Catastrophe Baker and a Canticle for Leibowitz”, Mike Resnick
19. “The Far End of History”, John C. Wright

The book is due out from HarperEos in the United States and HarperCollins Publishers in Australia this coming July.

IRA Plonkers.

So, we have the ‘Continuity IRA’ and the ‘Real IRA’. You know, if they weren’t killing people this would almost be funny. Doesn’t all this remind you of something out of The Life of Brain

BRIAN: Are you the Judean People’s Front?
REG: Fuck off!
BRIAN: What?
REG: Judean People’s Front. We’re the People’s Front of Judea! Judean People’s Front. Cawk.
FRANCIS: Wankers.
BRIAN: Can I… join your group?
REG: No. Piss off.

Isn’t it a shame that some people’s existence only relates to the past, and never the future.