Article 18: Who Threw That?

  Here’s an article I wrote quite some years ago. I probably did it at around about the time films like Armageddon were doing the rounds since it seem likely the reporter or the news story concerned was looking for something ‘topical’.

WHO THREW THAT?

So, on February the 1st 2019 there is a chance, cosmically speaking, of a large lump of rock slamming into Earth. According to ‘expert opinion’, so the media told us on the morning of this announcement, this thing is a mile and half wide and will impact with enough force to wipe out a country the size of Britain. This was then upgraded, within an hour, to be one capable of wiping out the USA – a change I put down to both media hype and a dearth of information. Of course experts will vie with each other to predict greater and greater disasters to get themselves on television, so you can expect by the time you read this that the asteroid will destroy all life on Earth. But then maybe it could. What happens if it hits the oilfields, what changes might it make to the weather, might it perturb Earth’s orbit enough to sling us into an ice age or turn everything to desert? I’m not an expert, so I can’t really say. At present, measurements are not yet accurate enough to tell us precisely what will happen. The asteroid will probably miss us completely and go round for another try in ex-thousand years time. What is certain is that measurements will become more and more accurate as the asteroid draws closer. Personally, I hope that they show, in the near future, that the asteroid is certain to impact. This is not because I am a nihilist, but because such a state of affairs would impel the kind of hard technological advances not seen since the World Wars. We have the time and ability to stop this thing, but we would have to get off our arses to do so. Such a threat could pump huge amounts of cash, heretofore blown on military spending and idiot bureaucracy, into giving us a firmer foothold in space. Resultant developments would be hugely beneficial and solid – we would not be able to afford the dipstick mistakes that have wasted the last few Mars’ missions – and I can see that how once the rock is blown off course there’ll be no turning back. Suddenly we’ll be dwellers in a huge and hostile universe, not post-Copernican Earthlings. And even those grandads saying, “Well, we didn’t have those new-fangled asteroid thingies in my day,” will have to sit up and take notice. For the SF writer there are other situations to extrapolate. Taking the phrase ‘capable of wiping-out the USA’ it is almost inevitable that the Bin Ladens of this world will say that it has been sent to do just that. Let me predict that they’ll name the asteroid ‘The Fist of God’, and that fundamentalist terrorists will do everything they can to sabotage any project to change its course. Because there will be no guarantee that the project will be successful, a more careless attitude to life and liberty might prevail. Maybe the Western World would take this opportunity, in the purported interests of humanity, to flatten the Middle East and take control of the oil. Don’t doubt this possibility. It’s worth being reminded that the firepower of a couple of nuclear submarines could do the job. Have people already forgotten what atomic bombs can do, and more specifically, neutron bombs? Perhaps Pakistan and India will take this opportunity to settle their differences – end-of-the-world scenarios being an excuse for all sorts of mayhem. Will China just sit back and watch all this? And, there is always the most unlikely possibility: this could be a unifying influence on the entire planet. Taking an even larger and more tongue-in-cheek view, one might even wonder about the timing. Consider how fortunate we were to have a moon that strips away atmosphere thus preventing this planet going catastrophically greenhouse and ending up like Venus – a moon that also gives tides so that life developing in the water will certainly also end up on land. Previous impacts wiped out life forms that would not have led to us. The asteroid that drove the dinosaurs extinct ended the 160 million-year reign of creatures that showed no signs of growing brains larger than peanuts. Aptly-timed ice ages then led to the survival of creatures with an interest in banging rocks together. A hundred years ago we would have been unable to do anything about the approaching cataclysm, moreover, probably would not even have detected it. This is all obviously the determinist 20/20 hindsight of the bible-thumping trench survivor: “God loves me, that’s why the shrapnel took the top off of Harry’s head and not mine.” But it’s just as obvious that the aliens sent this rock, and that we have seventeen years in which to prove ourselves fit to join the galactic community.

Science Fiction Laser Beam Nonsense!


This was passed onto me from my brother Bob. It’s on Tom’s Guide.

In September, we reported that Boeing successfully defeated a ground target using its Advanced Tactical Laser aircraft. Now the company has shown its laser prowess again by tracking and destroying small, unmanned aerial vehicles in the air. A single laser beam, fired by the U.S. Air Force-sponsored Mobile Active Targeting Resource for Integrated eXperiments (MATRIX), shot down five UAVs at various ranges.

Squids in space next maybe?

My Books in America

A comment on the previous post is one I’ve been reading a lot from American readers. It is, apparently, difficult to obtain my books over there. The first reason for this is that Tor US doesn’t publish them all, it’s a shame, but what can I do?

However, some while ago someone directed my attention to The Book Depository which states on its website Free worldwide delivery on every book. If you go on there and stick my name in the search you get most of my books, and they’re even discounted. For example, you can buy a copy of Gridlinked, in its nice new cover, for £4.75 including postage and packing. Still suspicious I checked out the ‘to these location’ bit and the USA is there. In fact there’s a huge list of countries there. They also use Paypal.

Now, I haven’t used The Book Depository myself so don’t know how good it is or how true the promises on the website. I believe others have used it and been satisfied. Please, if any of you reading this do buy books through them, let me know how it went.

More Books!

Having seen my previous post Dave Robotham tells me I may be biased as I am a huge fan of your books but I go out of my way to make sure we have all of your backlist in stock and sent me the picture below from a week ago to prove the point.

Dave is the assistant manager of both branches of Waterstone’s in Woking and tells me that since this picture The Engineer Recondition is back in stock as well as Runcible Tales, and that Cowl is flying off the shelves in its new jacket. So, if any of you reading this are in the Woking area, go buy books in Waterstones!

The Departure.

Okay, a little while ago I finished The Departure, wrote a couple of synopses and some blurbs for it, then sent it off to Macmillan. Good response from the commissioning editor (bloody marvelous). Here’s one of the blurbs for you:

Like Wellsian war machines the shepherds stride into riots to grab up the ringleaders and drag them off to Inspectorate HQ for adjustment, unless they are in shredding mode, in which case their captives visit community digesters, or rather whatever of them has not been washed down the street drains.
Pain inducers are used for adjustment, and soon the Committee will have the power to edit human minds, but not yet, twelve billion human beings need to die before Earth can be stabilized, but by turning large portions of Earth into concentration camps this is achievable, especially when the Argus satellite laser network comes fully online…
Alan Saul has taken a different route to disposal, waking as he does inside a crate on the conveyor into the Calais incinerator. How he got there he does not know, but he does remember the pain and the face of his interrogator. Janus speaks to Saul through the hardware implanted in his skull, sketching the nightmare world for him. And Saul decides to bring it all crashing down…
Not sure if this is what will be appearing on the back of the book, but it gives you a taste of what it’s all about.

More Orbus Stuff

There were a few reviews I had intended to mention here before but, operating out of an Internet cafe for the last eight months, I found it difficult to put together the information to post here. Next year I’m going to definitely have Internet out in Crete, despite the cost.

Okay, first up has to be this one over at Walker of Worlds (Mark Chitty) . It being 10/10 I guess you can understand why I like it. Then there’s Meirion’s review over at Book Geeks which is gratifying because here’s a first-time reader of my stuff.

But, if these are far too nice for you, go find the Strange Horizons review of Orbus, for the ‘this is shit because he’s not politically correct, the book is bloated and he’s a crap writer’.

Conflicts.

Ian Whates, who edited the Subterfuge anthology published October 2008 will be producing another one called Conflicts due for publication in April. Here, as of two weeks ago is the provisional running order:
Psi.Copath – Andy Remic The Maker’s Mark – Michael Cobley Sussed – Keith Brooke The Cuisinart Effect – Neal Asher Harmony in My Head – Rosanne Rabinowitz Our Land – Chris Beckett Fallout – Gareth L. Powell Proper Little Soldier – Martin McGrath War Without End – Una McCormack Dissimulation Procedure – Eric Brown In the Long Run – David L. Clements Last Orders – Jim Mortimore Songbirds – Martin Sketchley
Maybe there’ll be another of those signed limited editions as there was with Subterfuge. I’ll let you know more about this when I know too. But maybe Ian is a bit busy since he acquired John Jarrold as an agent last year and is involved with Ian Watson producing The Mammoth Book of Alternate Histories…