Aftermath — Peter Robinson.

This begins with the discovery of a house like Fred West’s, touches on the political farce and travesty of justice that was the Tony Martin case (though under a different name) with reference to a police officer being pilloried under the ‘criminals are victims’ dogma, and truly does live up to its title. The aftermath is that of child abuse, of the hunt for a serial killer, of the separation of the leading character from his wife … but then everything is, in some sense, an aftermath.

Inspector Banks here combines aspects of many who’ve gone before: Frost, Dalgleish, Morse (well, he listens to classical music), and it’s always nice to discover another police procedural to enjoy and another detective to add to that growing list. This could be done really well on television, supposing ITV ever has the money to spare and both it and the BBC ever lose interest in preaching political correctness and the joys of multiculturalism. But meanwhile I’ll have to content myself with the knowledge that there’s another eleven Inspector Banks’ books to read, which suits me fine.

2. Calling all Artists!

Regarding the earlier post about an art competition, here’s a scattering of gabbleduck descriptions:

It wasn’t long before I saw something galumphing through the grasses with the gait of a bear, though on Earth you don’t get bears weighing in at about a thousand kilos. Of course I recognised it, who hasn’t seen recording of these things and the other weird and wonderful creatures of that world? The gravcar view drew lower and kept circling above the creature. Eventually it seemed to get bored with running, halted, then slumped back on its rump to sit like some immense pyramidal Buddha. It opened its composite forelimbs into their two sets of three ‘sub-limbs’ for the sum purpose of scratching its stomach. It yawned, opening its big duck bill to expose thorny teeth inside. It gazed up at the gravcar with seeming disinterest, some of the tiara of green eyes arcing across its domed head blinking as if it was so bored it just wanted to sleep.
A poor looking specimen, about the size of a Terran black bear, its head was bowed low, the tip of its bill resting against the ground. Lying on the filthy stone beside it were the dismembered remains of something obviously grown hastily in a vat – weak splintered bones and watery flesh, tumours exposed like bunches of grapes. While Jael watched, the gabbleduck abruptly hissed and heaved its head upright. Its green eyes ran in an arc across its domed head, there were twelve or so of them: two large egg-shaped ones towards the centre, two narrow ones below these like underscores, two rows of small round ones arcing out to terminate against two triangular ones. They all had lids – the outer two blinking open and closed alternately. Its conjoined forelimbs were folded mummy-like across the raised cross-hatch ribbing of its chest, its gut was baggy and veined, and purple sores seeped in its brown-green skin.
The creature was sitting in a stand of flute grass and in this pose its body was pyramidal. Its three pairs of forelimbs were folded monkishly over the jut of its lower torso, one fore-talon of one huge black claw seemingly beating time to some unheard song. Its domed head was tilted down, its duck bill against its chest. Some of its tiara of emerald eyes were closed. Obviously it was taking time out to digest its latest meal, the bones of which lay neatly stacked beside it.
The big gabbleduck was lolloping through the flute grasses. “Moves like a grizzly bear,” he observed.
She marched forwards and round until she was standing directly in front of the creature. It was indeed massive: folds of flesh hanging down from its body and almost concealing its powerful rear limbs. When it moved through the flute grasses its three sets of two forelimbs slotted neatly together to form two composite forelimbs so it seemed to run on all fours like, as Jonas had observed, a bear. Now those forelimbs were folded on its chest, and sat like this it seemed some immense alien Buddha.
Its head was level with me. Anders chose that moment to groan and I quickly slapped my hand over her mouth. The creature was pyramidal, all but one of its three pairs of arms folded complacently over jut of its lower torso. In one huge black claw it held the remains of a sheq. With the fore-talon of another claw, it was levering a trapped bone from the white holly-thorn lining of its duck bill. The tiara of green eyes below its domed skull glittered.
The arm folded out and out. The wrongness I felt about it, I guess, stemmed from the fact that it possessed too many joints. A three-fingered hand, with claws like black scythes, closed on the blimp anchor and pulled. Seated on the peak, the gabbleduck looked like some monstrous child holding the string of a toy balloon. “Brong da lockock,” it said.
Scrolling the text down moved the scene along to soon reveal the creature itself: it squatted in the grasses like some monstrously insectile hybrid of Buddha and Kali, with a definite splash of Argus in the ocular region.
At this point, the gabbleduck, with its multiple arms folded on its triple-keeled chest, turned its array of green eyes upon the pious brother.
Easing herself higher, Eldene peered in the direction Fethan was pointing. In the moonlight, it did not take her long to discern that something was nosing along the edge of a patch where the grass grew thickest. All she could see for a moment was a body like a boulder and a long duck bill swinging from side to side, then the creature reared onto its hind legs, opened out its sets of forepaws from the wide triple keel of its chest, and blinked its tiara of greenish eyes as it prepared for its latest oration. “Y’floggerdabble uber bazz zup zupper,” it stated portentously.
The gabbleduck appeared as a pyramidal monstrosity looking down on the little man.
Stanton began to bring his stolen aerofan down into thick flute grass, saw something large thundering towards him with what he felt were not the best intentions, and quickly jerked the column up and away to get out of range. A great flat beak clapped shut with a sound like a mat being beaten on concrete. He caught a glimpse of an array of glowing green eyes below a domed head, the muscled column of a body with more limbs than seemed plausible, and a whiff of quite horrible halitosis. Pulling away, he heard something that sounded like someone swearing in a quite obscure language.
Cormac observed the curving row of slightly luminous green eyes set into the white dome of the creature’s head, as it watched them move on past it. When it was upright like this, those eyes were perhaps three metres above the ground. The claws terminating its multiple forearms were the size and shape of bunches of bananas, only bananas made of obsidian and sharpened to points glinting in the morning light.
The gabbleduck was mountainous: a great pyramid of flesh squatting in the flute grasses, its multiple forearms folded across its chest, its bill wavering up and down as if it was either nodding an affirmative or nodding off to sleep. It regarded Blegg with its tiara of emerald eyes ranged below the dome of its head.
The gabbleduck stretched out one limb and opened out a hand composed of talons like black bananas.

Mika now turned to see the massive pyramidal shape of a gabbleduck, squatting right at the centre of the grated floor, its multiple forearms folded across its chest, its bill dipped onto its chest. It gazed at Dragon with a tiara of emerald eyes ranged just below the naked dome of its head, then turned slightly to fix its gaze on Mika.

BFPO 2005

Didn’t post a lot on this year – it must have been a busy one, or perhaps the last paragraph explains it:

19th Dec.
On the Edge of the Sand now bears the title Prador Moon (for reasons not entirely clear to me, but then I don’t have to sell the book). Polity Agent is now coming under Peter Lavery’s scary pencil and I’m about 85,000 words into Hilldiggers. The Engineer ReConditioned is up for sale POD and I’ve learnt that the distributor (for next year), Diamond, apparently has 800 pre-orders so that’s looking nice.
I’ll be at Forbidden Planet in London to do a stock signing (for Sable Keech HB and Brassman PB), on Saturday 18th Feb from 1-2pm. If you want a copy signed to you, and are in the vicinity, come on in! I’ll be there from about 12.30 — to begin with probably ensconced in some dusty stock room. I’ve just taken up the offer of broadband from Virgin (same price for a year as 24/7 if you were a 24/7 customer). I’m not sure this is a great idea since I’ve been spending too much time titting around on message boards just lately, rather than getting on with some work. Obviously this means an increase in the speed of that titting around and much else but, as I said on one of those message boards: crap increases to fill the bandwidth available.

Calling all Artists!

I’m noticing that scattering amidst the followers of this blog there’s quite a few artists so, bearing that in mind, do any of you guys or any others drifting through here fancy having a go at doing some pictures? Specifically I’m looking for scenes, characters, drones, monsters or anything else you can think of from my fiction. I’ve yet to see, for example, a depiction of a gabbleduck that matches up to what I see in my head. Here you can see two attempts at that, one the cover of The Gabble and the other from the front page of the Asimov’s that first published Alien Archaeology. Perhaps you’d like to do something from The Skinner, maybe a heirodont, ocean or land, maybe a glister or one of the varieties of whelks like the frog whelks here. Plenty of other things that can be attempted, maybe a sand hog from Brass Man with Anderson mounted up, or Mr Crane himself. There’s the spaceships too, like the Ogygian, the Jerusalem or the Cable Hogue. I leave that decision entirely up to you…
The pictures that turn up I’ll display here with any links the artist wants and the three pictures (by separate artists) I judge best will each receive a free copy of Orbus when it comes out next September. If anyone comes up with that picture I’m seeking of a gabbleduck by then, that’ll be worth a copy of Orbus plus copies of the rest of the Macmillan backlist of my books. My contact details can be found in ‘Contacts’ on my Virgin website.

Paul Di Filippo revew of Shadow

Interesting review of Shadow of the Scorpion by Paul Di Filippo here at Sci Fi Weekly:

The way the soldiers of the Polity are rebuilt after what would otherwise be fatal wounds; the way the Separatists wage an insurgency; the way the commanders of the Polity ruthlessly direct their war; the nature of an enemy like the Prador—all these elements and more bespeak close attention to 21st-century headlines. Asher even subtly connects sex and torture, as in the Abu Ghraib scandal. Here’s Yallow seducing Cormac: “I’m going to need your undivided attention for a good hour.” And here’s ultra-tough Agent Spencer preparing to torture information out of a rebel named Sheen: “You are a very valuable piece of meat and you are going to receive my utter attention over the next few hours.” Case closed.

BFPO 2004

5th Feb Another translation deal I’ve just learnt about: Bastei Lubbe in Germany, who previously published Gridlinked and The Skinner, have now taken The Line of Polity and Cowl in a two book deal. The first will be published in May this year and the second in spring 2005. Brass Man is done and dusted (well, apart from the copy editing) and now I’m back on The Voyage of the Sable Keech I’ve just received the hardback and trade paperback issues of Cowl, and very nice they look too. That’s about it… 9th March The first reviews of Cowl are coming in (though it hasn’t actually been released yet) and things are looking good. ‘Dreamwatch Recommends’ and rates it nine out of ten, there’s a good one at http://www.computercrowsnest.com and now another excellent review from Russell Letson in Locus. Once again I’ve sold Snow in the Desert (nice double meaning there), this time for translation in a Czech SF magazine called Ikarie. Additional to the German sale below, I’ve since learnt that Bastei Lubbe took Cowl without even reading it. Now there’s a boost to the confidence. The Voyage of the Sable Keech is now rapidly approaching 140,000 words. I’m feeling particularly pleased with myself as yesterday I polished off the best part of 5000 words. People reading this may be tempted to ask, “But were they good words?” I’ve always found that when I’m churning it out that quickly it usually is good. It’s when I’m laboring over it that it often needs revision. 10th March Another excellent review of Cowl here at http://trashotron.com by Rick Kleffel. I’ve also learnt that Editorial Presenca in Portugal have bought the book for translation. All rather cool really: two translations and four excellent reviews before the book has even been released! 23rd March The limited hardback print run of Cowl has already nearly sold out, and now Macmillan are doing a second one. Hang onto those first editions – they’ll be collector’s items! 24th March In the Gallery on this site I’ve put up bookmarks (I hope this works) so if you have a colour printer and some A4 card you can print up you very own Neal Asher bookmarks. This is total self-promotion, but then what’s this website for? 5th April Tor Macmillan have received and offer for translation rights to Gridlinked, The Skinner and The Line of Polity from Eksmo publishers in Moscow. That’s seven countries now – I’m going to have to set something up in Excel to keep track of it all. I’ve just finished the first draft of The Voyage of the Sable Keech at 152,000 words. Still much to do as some areas need expanding and some need severely hacking, but I need to get away from it for a while so I can come back later and sort wood from trees. And a late addition here: those who want their typescripts checked over professionally should check out John Jarrold’s Script Doctor site https://www.sff.net/people/john-jarrold/ 30th May Now Macmillan have just agreed a new 2-book deal with Stefan Bauer of Bastei-Lubbe (Germany) for Brass Man and The Voyage of the Sable Keech. The first book not yet published and the second book I haven’t even finished working on. Apparently I am now also one of their top SF authors. Excellent reviews of The Skinner (American edition) have now appeared in the New York Times and in Science Fiction Weekly www.scifi.com Also, check out the ‘Gallery’ here for the German cover of The Line of Polity. 24th June Another draft of Voyage of the Sable Keech completed. I’ve written an epilogue for it now and linked chapter starts detailing life forms on Spatterjay as they apply to the story. It now stands at 160,000 words. Having printed that book up, and passed it on to various readers, time for me to turn my attention elsewhere: short stories, novellas, maybe the next novel. 27th July I’m now 40,000 words into book seven which may be called Polity Agent or Agent Prime Cause unless I come up with another title. The Romanian publisher Lucman in Bucharest have made an offer for the translation rights to Cowl and The Line of Polity. And my stories The Thrake and Watchcrab, in Hadrosaur Tales magazine and on the Agony Column (link in contacts) site respectively, received honourable mention in Gardner Dozois’s 21st Annual Year’s Best Science fiction. 4th Aug. I’ve now introduced on here a page where you can order signed copies, some of them first editions, directly from me.

Space Pirates

One of the magazines started submitting to just at about the time I was being taken on by Macmillan was Hadrosaur Tales, which it now seems publishes Tales of the Talisman and also some books. My first tale appeared in issue 8 and will be one anyone who has read Gridlinked will recognize The Dragon in the Flower. Subsequently The Thrake appeared in issue 16 but by this time I was finding it difficult to unearth stories that hadn’t appeared somewhere or were being saved for a collection. However, when the editor David Lee Summers asked me if I had something nautical to appear in his Space Pirates anothology I did have something nasty called Bad Travelling available, a tale about a rather traumatic sailing voyage on an alien world and, though it wasn’t Spatterjay, there were some seriously nasty things in the sea.

Here’s the length blurb for this anthology:

Space Pirates it the first anthology of the Full-Throttle Space Tales series. Edited by David Lee Summers, editor of Tales of the Talisman, Space Pirates contains fifteen swashbuckling tales of pirates in space, by established and rising-star authors. The contents of this treasure chest of adventure include these swarthy tales of deep-space piracy: Eating Vacuum, by Robert E Vardeman: An asteroid miner matches wits with a desperate pirate who is short on oxygen. On the Even of the Last Great Ratings War, by David Boop: Genetically engineered animals battle humans for control of the space-borne airwaves. Adrift, by Carol Hightshoe: The Flying Dutchman legend takes to outer space. Bad Traveling, by Neal Asher: Pirates sailing the seas of a distant planet find their match in alien monsters of the deep. Carbon Copy, by Denielle Ackley-McPhail: Recently demoted Private Alexander suspects that one of the ships of the space fleet are bearing false colors. Space Pirate Cookies, by C.J. Henderson: Aliens are mocking humanity, and that means war. For a Job Well Done, by David Lee Summers: A ruthless pirate finds himself rescuing a victim of human trafficking on the planet Epsilon Indi 2. Lunacy by Anna Paradox: The moon is being taxed to death, and a teenage girl is caught in the middle.by a satellite laser weapon. The Claims Adjustor, by David B. Riley: An insurance claims adjustor from Mars wants to ferret out the pirates who are driving up the cost of shipping from Earth. Never Lie to Yourself, by Uncle River: When a young boy marooned in a space habitat disaster is rescued by bloodthirsty pirates, what exactly does he owe his rescuers? Star Wench, by Daniel M. Hoyt: Captain Beech of the HMS Bounty IV must match his wits against a notorious pirate to save his spaceship’s crew. Searching the Vastness of Space, by Alan L. Lickiss: Rory is a bureaucrat who believes he has discovered proof of interstellar piracy, but finds that pirates are not always what they seem. Captain Barti Ddu, by M.H. Bonham: Morgan Roberts’ life is saved during an attack by Atolian Pirates.by an Eighteenth Century Buccaneer. Earth-Saturn Transit, by W.A. Hoffman: Pirates in deep space are bound by debilitating circuits in their heads, but where there are pirates, there will be mutineers. Ship’s Daughter, by Pamela D. Lloyd and Karl Grotegut: A pirate’s daughter must prove herself to the rest of the crew, without losing her humanity.

BFPO 2003

Before I got into this blogging lark I used to stick posts up on my website Neal Asher Space and now, since I’m going to do some work there I though it might be an idea to move my BFPO (Battlefront Post Office) posts over here. Unfortunately, you’ll find that some of the links here no longer function.

Early February 2003
When I handed in the initial draft of Gridlinked, I was told I needed to lose the scooby-dooish ending — that there should be no need for explanation. I’ve since found that there’s plenty of people who want that explanation, so, if you press this link, you’ll see that ending. But don’t press it unless you’ve read the book!
Just had to put this somewhere: “In the film business, as probably in everything else, the best and most approachable people are those who are confident in their own abilities.” – Barry Norman.
My story The Thrake will be appearing in Hadrosaur Tales sometime soon.
Tor books have now signed up for Gridlinked and The Skinner. God Bless America!
New contract signed with Pan Macmillan for the three books listed below:
Cowl. Cowl awaits at the Nexus where he is attempting to poison the protoseas of Earth. He drags people back using organic time machines, the tors, which are in turn scales from the back of the torbeast: the Eater of Worlds. From the far future they are fighting him, as best they can, but even with the sun tap they do not have the power to reach that far back. Jane, dragged back, finds a freeloader in the piece of military tech she wears: the Muse 184. And Tack, the vat grown programmable killer who is after her, is given a mission important to the survival of the human race.
Brass Man. This is the sequel to Gridlinked and The Line of Polity, and I don’t really want to tell you much more than that, though some will guess certain elements of the story from the title!
The Voyage of the Sable Keech. This sequel to The Skinner takes place on Spatterjay, and who can guess what’s going to happen in that nightmare place. Possibly a borderline psychotic war drone called Sniper might put in an appearance, perhaps Sable Keech himself is around, and maybe a Prador adolescent survived its encounter with a Molly Carp. You never can tell.
3rd Feb. Over Christmas I received the dust jacket for the Tor (America) edition of Gridlinked, which will be coming out as a hardback in August.
Recently received an offer for Snow in the Desert as published in Spectrum SF 8 (check novellas page) to be reprinted in Year’s Best Science Fiction #8.
14th Feb. The forum is now operating on the Tor UK website. Come and have a chat!
W H Smiths will be doing some sort of promotion with The Skinner (pb) so it will be released early – next week in fact. (28/2/03)
10th April. Tor (UK), Macmillan’s new SF imprint can be found here www.toruk.com . Ah, and there’s a message board up for me on the TTA website here www.ttapress.com/discus
I’ve now added a gallery to this site in which to pin up any pictures of interest. There’s some from the Tor UK launch party, a picture of the American cover … I’ll add other stuff later.
I’m now also up on the Nightshade forum http://www.nightshadebooks.com/cgi-bin/discus/discus.cgi and if this continues I won’t find time to write any books.
22nd April. Book marks and note paper added to the gallery, and thumbnail pictures. Hope it all works.
24th April.
I’m told there’ll be a review of The Line of Polity in this Saturday’s Guardian by Jon Courtenay Grimwood. I’m also told that the first print run has nearly gone, so hang onto those first editions.
Now here’s something else of interest: the number you see on the copyright page 135798642 tells you what edition the book is. What I didn’t know, until it was explained to me by Rog Peyton (Andromeda), was how or why. Apparently it costs quite a bit to make alterations after the first printing, so the lowest digit in that number tells you the edition. When they do the second edition, they just delete the 1 so the lowest digit is 2, and so on. The number is arranged so you count 123456789 inwards from the outside, so that with each deletion it remains central on the page. Well there you go.
14th May. Ah, twas the Saturday after. There’s also been an excellent review by Peter Tennant in issue 34 of TTA. And while I’m on the subject, also in SFX by Saxon Bullock, and Starburst, and Dreamwatch. No doubt when I get a bad one I’ll implode.
120,000 words into Brass Man now.
I’ve removed the bookmarks and notepaper from the gallery as couldn’t get them to work properly. Stuck a couple of pictures up there instead.
16th June. Okay, it’s been a little while since I’ve written in here, and now is a good a time as any.
An excellent review by Russell Letson of The Line of Polity has appeared in the latest Locus; I’ve just recieved two wonderful hard back copies of Gridlinked from Tor in America (it’ll go on general sale next month); and of The Skinner, Tanith Lee says: ‘…absolute solid gold genius’ so overall I’m feeling pretty happy and sure I must be doing something right!
I’ve now finished the first draft of Brass Man. It weighs in at 145,000 words. I’m now leaving it alone and trying to forget it, so I can take a fresh look in a few months.
The Tanjen version of The Engineer being a bit of a rarity, and it seeming that this is a book some people would like to obtain, I approached Sean Wallace at Cosmos Books about doing a re-release. I thought first about calling it The Engineer Reloaded, but maybe that’s taking the piss. How about The Engineer Reconditioned? It will consist of the original novella and stories, but with introductions, and some extra stories. I’m presently working through it all again and cringing at the mistakes. I guess that when I stop doing that it’ll be time to give up writing.
At the end of this week I’m off on holiday to Scotland, but taking a detour to speak to the Hull SF group on Saturday 19th.
9th Aug. Precisely on the day Gridlinked was released in America I received an email from Gardner Dozois letting me know that he wants to publish two of my stories: The Veteran and the first Mason’s Rats story. The timing could not have been more perfect. I’ve also been sent an uncorrected proof copy of a book from Tor in America in the hope that I’ll offer some sort of quote. Does this mean I’m not the new boy anymore?
21st Aug. Major revamp here with the addition of anthology and magazine pages and a redistribution of everything else. I’ve just received copies of Year’s Best SF 8, and Terror Tales issue one, both of which you can see in the anthologies section. Erm, what else? I’m 28,000 words into The Voyage of the Sable Keech and they haven’t even built the ship yet…
5th Sept. A few items: I see that Cowl is now up on Amazon for pre-orders, as is the hardback American version of The Skinner, which is to be released next April. You can now also find the list of my top ten fantasy books on the Guardian website at: http://books.guardian.co.uk/top10s/top10/0,6109,1033620,00.html And I’m now 43,000 words into Sable (which incidentally won’t see the light of day for over two and a half years).
22nd Sept. The French rights to The Skinner and Gridlinked will be licensed to Pocket/Fleuve Noir (part of Universpoche – one of the largest publishers in France). It’s likely that they’ll start with The Skinner within the next 18 months and will then publish Gridlinked at a later date. Gardner Dozois at Asimov’s has now also accepted Strood for publication. And it looks as if Cowl will be coming out in hardcover next March.
28th Sept. I’ve come across (or been led to) a couple of interesting message boards: Malazan Empire & Dead Cities. The picture of the The Skinner dust jacket is up on Amazon, and now here. Sable is at about 70,000 and getting steadily more complicated and bloody. Gardner Dozois at Asimov’s has taken another short story: Strood.
6th Oct. Night Watch by Terry Pratchett should be required reading for so very many people. Here’s one sample: “Confiscate all weapons and crime would go down. … Amazingly, quite a few weapons were handed in. The flaw, was one that had somehow escaped Swing, and it was this: criminals don’t obey the law. It’s more or less a requirement for the job. They had no particular interest in making the streets safer for anyone except themselves. And they couldn’t believe what was happening. It was like Hogswatch every day.”
I’ve just received the cover picture for Cowl and it is now up in books.
A lot is being said about whether university tuition fees are fair. Not enough is being said about what is taught. Universities educate the people we need for the future. Perhaps we should subsidize the subjects that usefully educate our youngsters and charge for those that provide us with parasites and non-producers. This way we might end up with fewer law, sociology, psychology, media studies and political science graduates and more engineers, biologists, physicists and doctors. (pub. Mail on Sunday 19/10/03)
14th Oct. “Everybody against the war. People talking openly. How can a country go into a major war with a population so dead set against it?” was what William L Shirer (writer of The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich) penned in his dairy about Berlin’s inhabitants, the day before Hitler’s forces invaded Poland. The next relevant quote has to be George Satayana: “Those who fail to learn the lessons of history are doomed to repeat it.” I guess this is to be expected from a government that shows as much contempt for its own country’s history as did Hitler for his…
9th Nov. ‘ONE OF THE BEST WRITERS OF ADVENTURE SF presently working anywhere, Neal Asher also creates the most horrific and wonderful monsters in the genre since the publication of Harry Harrison’s Deathworld. His novel The Skinner uses a wonderful device, in the heading to each chapter, of an ever-more-dreadful monster discovering that it is not the top of the food chain. Each of his Human Polity novels has more dash and brio than a handful of finely-crafted literary fictions, and their characters fizz off the page. The Line of Polity is Neal’s most recent novel, published this Spring.’ — John Jarrold writing in SFX (10 authors to watch) Thanks John.
10th Nov. In the hope that I might make some positive quotes, Simon & Schuster have just sent me a copy of The Darkness That Comes Before by R Scott Bakker. As Bakker was one of the ten authors mentioned in the SFX article below, I’ll certainly give it a go.
11th Nov. Just seen Matrix Revolutions. While Matrix Reloaded was about 70% crap, I have to say the Watchowski brothers have now managed to deliver the pure product. A triumph of special effects over content, with a cast from the plank school of acting: pure unadulterated crap. In a particular scene I was nearly overwhelmed by the urge to shout, “Give it one while it’s still warm!” but luckily, at about that point, my large intestine crawled up my spine and tried to throttle my brain.
8th Dec. The Turner prize has been won by a man in a frock displaying a pot decorated with mediocre pictures said to represent child-abuse. Much controversy surrounds the last-minute removal from the pot, by the winner, of the dry-cured turd wrapped up in a ribbon. Apparently it was a close-run thing because of the entry, by a Muslim lesbian, of a simnel cake decorated with a dead dog with a cucumber thrust up its bottom – said to represent the anger of vegetarian activists at the failure of Labour to ban fox-hunting. Judges of the prize said the entry of an ash-tray filled with tumours was risible and unsubtle, and that the competitor concerned had not truly learnt the art, taught in art colleges over many decades, of talking complete bollocks to justify crap to a bunch a pseuds. Rumours that there are people being taught how to draw, paint and create sculptures have been dismissed as highly unlikely. Who would come to view the products of such antiquated skills?
16th Dec. A lot has happened over the last month. Another crap Turner prize has passed into history and now the Hobbit has been found in Iraq. They checked him for weapons of mass destruction but only found a ring.
The Skinner has now been taken for translation by a Czechoslovakian publisher, and Gridlinked by a Spanish one, so things advance apace there. I’ve handed in Brass Man and the reaction seems good thus far, and am now continuing with Sable. Gardner Dozois has now accepted another story for Asimov’s. Softly Spoke the Gabbleduck he felt pretty sure he was going to reject because, although well-crafted, it covered much the same ground as half a dozen other stories. It was apparently saved by the gabbleduck. ‘I couldn’t not run a story with a creature as interesting and weirdly menacing as a gabbleduck in it.’
What else? Spending Christmas in Chester with one of my brothers and his family. Then it’ll be nose to the grindstone in the new year, and a long rest for my liver.

Prador Moon Review

Nice review of Prador Moon here at NextRead:

Prador Moon is my second piece of Neal Asher and it’s a nice slice too. Actually it’s more than a slice. More like a thick chunk being 222 pages long. The story revolves around The Polity Collective’s first contact with an alien species – The Prador. This is a special occasion and one that doesn’t go well. The crab-like carnivore Prador make their intentions quite clear in the first meeting where they also discover quite quickly that they also like human flesh.