Dexter Ominbus — Jeff Lindsay

The language of the first page of this hauled me up, but I persevered and was soon in territory I recognized from the excellent TV series. I was a bit dubious about the somewhat camp depiction of Dexter and the emphasis on his ‘Dark Passenger’ which only kicked in in the TV series when he was pretending to have a drugs habit, both as an alibi with Rita and a way to put Doakes off the scent. I really enjoyed the first two books of this, noting the differences and being quite happy with them – there were quite simply things that happened in this only suitable an X classification and would have cut down on the success of the TV series. The last book I hated. Lindsay took Dexter’s ‘Dark Passenger’ into supernatural territory, Dexter himself became a soppy ineffectual mess, and I felt it was wrong wrong wrong.

Thing is, whilst there were a couple of really enjoyable books here, and the idea of Dexter is all down to Lindsay, I find the TV series a lot better. I think that the TV version nailed the essence of it, of Dexter, which was in the first two books, and definitely not in the last one. You may think it odd me feeling that straying into fantastical territory was the wrong thing to do here, if you do, then go read my post about UFOs again.

District 9

So I finally got round to watching District 9 last night. I did enjoy it, but with reservations. Yes, the way of presenting the story with news clips, segments from interviews and CCTV shots was interesting, but jarring at first – took a little getting used to. The aliens themselves were okay, but really, I’ve yet to see truly alien aliens anywhere other than the film of that name (and even they were a bit too anthropomorphic).
Some usual Hollywood tropes and issues here. Why did the alien spaceship choose to park over Johannesburg? Because characters speaking with an Afrikaans accent is sure to raise the spectre of racism, which was rather unsubtle. Admittedly Blomkamp was brave giving the ‘Nigerians’ such a bad guy role. And of course, the arch bad guys role has to be taken by the big corporation. Now where have I seen that before? Oh yeah, Avatar, all the Alien films, Blade Runner, Terminator (initially) – in fact, how often is it not the big evil corporation that’s ultimately to blame?
We had here a spin on the idea of giving beads to the natives in exchange for something more valuable, but that the beads were cans of cat-food and the natives were aliens just transported from a starship I found plain silly. Why were they starving? Here we have a race capable of zipping across the light-years in their starship, their whole technology based on biotech, yet they are incapable of feeding themselves?
I have to wonder how these aliens, starving and dying aboard their spaceship, were transported to the ground, without anyone noticing a large number of big fuck-off Men in Black guns, along with an enormous alien military exoskeleton. I also have to wonder why the alien spaceship, hanging in the sky on some sort of antigravity and empty of the prawns themselves, wasn’t crawling with reverse engineering experts, scientists, in fact some massive research effort. And I also have to wonder why the shuttle dropped to the ground and was concealed; why it didn’t stay where it was. Starvation again? So what were the father and son prawn going to eat during their at least a year and half journey back home? Maybe a scene was cut showing the shuttle packed with cans of cat food.     

Suffice to say that we have some great scenes here – the action scenes are particularly good – but the whole, if you just think about it for a little while, doesn’t stand up to inspection.

Avatar Review

There are some spoilers here, so if you haven’t seen the film, don’t read this. Simples…

This was visually gorgeous. Superb, astounding special effects and three-dee that generally made things clearer and managed to impart a sense of scale I’d never before seen in a film. That first zero gravity scene with the arriving humans leaving their hibernation pods had me gob-smacked. There were jungle scenes later where I occasionally moved my head aside to stop getting whipped in the face by some plant, and there were other scenes when you felt you could reach out and touch something on the screen. A slight disconnect between the size of the aliens and the humans – I was constantly surprised when an arrow shot from a Na’vi bow arrived the size of a spear to impale a human, but that might be due to mental assumptions on my part, generally because the Na’vi were too human. Also when both humans and avatars were together in the human base that didn’t quite work. Small points, irrelevant points – I’ve never seen effects done so well.
The alien life was excellent too. I particularly liked the hyena-like creatures our hero had to defend himself from during his first night on the planet, and the lizard that took off like fluorescent helicopter, and the plants (animals?) retracting their parts into the ground like tubeworms. I did, however, feel that the visual gorgeousness was taken a little to far into fairy-light territory and half expected to see a glowing Santa Claus crouching on one of the branches. And there also seemed to be a bit of a disconnect: why was it all the mammal-like creatures had six legs whilst the Na’vi were bipeds? Well, I can let that go – insects share our world and have six legs too. Just another small point, really.
But then we get to the story itself. I won’t go with the disparaging ‘Dances with Smurfs’, this was, as others have noted, ‘Dances with Aliens’. In fact it wasn’t even that because, really, the Na’vi were too human. They were Indians, American Indians with a touch of African native or maybe Aborigine tossed into the mix, but they were also so much less than that. Not run-o-the-mill Indians these, but noble savages and the realization of that myth of natives living in harmony with Mother Nature, who herself has been turned into a living force the natives could plug into without using mescaline. These were the anti-thesis of nature-raping evil capitalist imperialists and were not the dead before forty, one child in four surviving, eat grubs and be happy natives that we know.
The sheer joy of the visual effects was degraded by the large green mallet regularly smacking me in the forehead. Earth is no longer green, we are told. Humans can splice alien and human DNA and grow hybrid avatars, they can travel between the stars, but apparently growing plants is beyond them. Obviously Earth has been raped by the corporates who have now gone to the stars to rape other worlds for the allegorical unobtanium. Big mistake on Pandora, however, because between their first encounter with the human military and their second, the Na’vi apparently invented armour-piercing arrows, whilst the humans neglected to consider the utility of dropping a rock on them from orbit.

Sigh.

There are those who are speculating that Avatar cost near on half a billion dollars. So, half a billion on special effects, wages for actors and others, on marketing, all of that, so couldn’t they have just spent a bit more on the story? My feeling, after wards: huge talent and astounding effects wasted on a clumsy and shallow parable. Such a shame.

Update: But in the end, what the fuck do I know? I’ve just been told by someone on the inside that Avatar has done 1.4 billion in just a few weeks.

Batman Dark Knight.

When Heath Ledger got an Oscar for his role as the Joker in Batman Dark Knight my reaction was a sneer. Here we go, Hollywood grief-fest and insincerity, and doesn’t everyone now love to take part in a bit of public grieving to demonstrate how sensitive they are? Doubtless if the man had lived his chances of getting that award would have dropped through the floor. Nothing quite like snuffing it young to translate you direct to the halls of fame.

It was, therefore, with a degree of cynicism that I sat down to watch the Batman film. Again that disjointedness, close shaky camera on the action, but, bloody hell. This was the best Batman film I’d seen and Heath Ledger gave us a superbly lunatic Joker. I guess he deserved his Oscar, in fact more than many other who’ve been presented with it. But does it mean much? The whole award has been devalued by being presented to a certain hypocritical money-grubbing politician.

Star Trek & Terminator Salvation

 
So, whilst in Crete we sat and watched the new Star Trek movie. I’d heard some bad reports about it and later, when back here, I read the same on the Internet from various people in the SF world. Apparently it was crap, and the film we should all be praising is Moon. I have to say I did dislike the modern tendency in it of getting in close with the shaky camera, and I disliked a certain disjointedness to the story and action, but…
Recently we sat and watched Terminator Salvation. In some parts it didn’t flow very well and, in an attempt to give the action more impact, clarity was sacrificed, but…
I do understand the reaction to these films from some quarters of the SF world. The former film had plenty of exploding spaceships, phaser fights and a planet-busting weapon, whilst the latter had too many lethal robots and too much ball-busting action. Both films didn’t contain sufficient angst, liberal-left didacticism or enough politically-correct homilies. They were, therefore, insufficiently worthy.

I loved them both and will watch them both again. 

The Day of the Triffids (again).

Yes, it’s yet another remake…

The triffids, apparently, are a source of fuel to supplant fossil fuels and have thus saved us from global warming. We get some thankfully understated lectures about how we fucked up the environment, with the implication that we’re getting what we deserve. This of course glosses over the fact that the disaster is due to a stellar event blinding most of the population. Maybe the ozone hole we created let the light in?

Next episode we can look forward to the hero of the hour uttering the immortal line, “Mother nature is reclaiming the planet”. Doubtless this will all end with homilies about how we should adopt a communal socialist agrarian lifestyle, sit around supping cabbage soup and farting out the tune of the Red Flag … but I’ll withhold full judgement until I’ve seen the second part.

Update:
Well, it didn’t end with the homilies but it was seriously bad. Yes, I said, this stranger appearing out of the night is going to turn out to be the hero’s dad. Why did that girl shoot at our hero, did he look like a triffid? Ah, reunion between hero and female lead, oh good grief, they’re dancing to an old gramophone record. Now the hero will have to go off on some silly mission to collect the head of a male triffid. Oops, that just got well telegraphed: the dad’s a gonner. Nope, they haven’t left that place yet because they’ve got to hang about waiting for a final confrontation with the bad guy. Ah, so pouring triffid poison into your eyes through an old African wooden mask makes triffids ignore you? That makes sense … not. And of course, the bad guy must get his just desserts from a triffid.
Lots of spoilers here, but then this – as Caroline described it – great pile of poo couldn’t really be spoiled. It was all over the place, disjointed rubbish that failed to suspend disbelief, and in which I felt absolutely nothing for the characters. Amazing how such a cast of very good actors simply couldn’t rescue it.

Slingers

Now this looks like it has possibilities — sent to me by Phil Edwards over at Live for Films. Check out Phil’s interview with the writer Mike Sizemore.


Slingers is set in the year 2960 A.D., following mankind’s first interplanetary war. Humanity is now clustered into a finite, but still vast section of the universe known as Enclosed Space. Humanity won the war with an aggressive alien enemy, but at a cost. The way back to Earth is now cut off by an impassable barrier – a side effect of the blast that finally pushed the enemy back.

Sunshine

With a growing feeling of disappointment I watched Sunshine last night. Certainly there were some superb effects, though with a distinctly Kubrik 2001 retro feel, but that was about all. I somewhat doubt that the crew would have been the best choice to save the entire human race, but was prepared to let that go. I couldn’t, however, sufficiently suspend disbelief to accept a fusion bomb the ‘size of Manhattan Island’ would boost the sun’s output. The sun is a massive fusion reaction and dropping such a bomb would be equivalent to boosting a fire the size of Jupiter by dropping a lit match into it.
Other problems too: a guy caught out on the shield protecting the ship from the sun is burnt up in a tsunami of fire … erm what exactly was burning? The crew also began to run out of oxygen, apparently, whilst occupying a ship whose interior seemed the equivalent to a number of Albert Halls. Then, rather than continue a story of humans vs the hostile reality of space – which really could have worked – the whole thing lapsed into an Alien aping cop-out.
Really, there was no need to have a nutter creeping around offing the crew – the groundwork had already be laid for some serious moral quandaries and killings threafter. And really, adding camera distortions on top of film taken by a cameraman apparently suffering from delirium tremens adds nothing, just makes the whole viewing process irritating.
Here was a film that couldn’t make up its mind whether it was 2001 or Alien, and ended up being neither them, nor what it could have been.

Paradox


So, we have solar storms stirring up the sun and knocking out electrical equipment here on Earth; the MOD satellite set to watch this activity is downloading image files from the future, offering clues to future crimes or disasters; we have debates about predestination, about the consequences of tampering with the timeline; we have speculation about where this information is coming from, like via a black hole, or god, and all this is wrapped up in an exciting police procedural. But it’s not science fiction apparently, well, according to Tamzin Outhwaite:
“Initially I thought it was a sci-fi project. Then I read the script and realised it wasn’t. It’s about police officers trying to work out whether there is a worm hole between two time zones.”
Ahem, a ‘worm-hole between two time zones’, need I go on? It’s always been fairly plain that many of the good people in the acting profession are a bit thick, but this one is right up there with a certain large comedienne’s statement, during a program about ‘the 100 best books’ that she doesn’t like science fiction, thereafter listing her favourites, like 1984. SFX notes that Tamzin Outhwaite ‘joins an esteemed list of actors in abject self-denial about appearing in sci-fi’ and doubtless David Langford will have something to say about this in his next Ansible (well-worth getting by email).

From my dictionary:

Paradox 1. a seemingly absurd or self-contradictory statement…

You gotta chuckle.