Tag: Film and TV

Outcasts (Yawn)

Posted on by Neal Asher

Well, I watched the first episode of Outcasts and I’m finding it difficult to summon up the will to make a coherent criticism of it, but I will strive to do so. It was dreadful and dull. I was reminded of some of the dry history tomes I’ve tried reading. In the past I’ve really wanted to find out more about the Roman Empire, the Aztecs, the Saxon Kings whatever, and on just about every occasion I’ve been defeated by how the historian concerned managed to turn an exciting and interesting subject into something as dry as dust. Here in Outcasts we have the colonization of a new world, the landing of an interstellar spacecraft, intrigue, murder, weird things in the woods, and it grabbed me about as tightly as a dead octopus.

The sets were dull, the clothing is dull, the story is dull, the extrapolation is dull etc.

But I guess those history books were different. Boring they might have been but they never made me cringe.

But why was it so bad? It spent far too much time having people emoting and sobbing at their computer screens; it spent far too much time ‘character building’ but not in a good way; it is obviously getting wrapped up in right-on human issues, man. The entire plot can be summed up as: having a bad time, latest spacecraft crashes. And it was obviously another spacecraft coming direct from planet North London.

Oh yeah, and apparently they’re on a world with a breathable atmosphere where parallel evolution has produced pine trees and grass. Apparently Earth has been rendered uninhabitable, though meanwhile they managed to put together an interstellar space drive and colony ships.

Nice replacement here for the awful Survivors, and it’ll probably get dumped just as quickly.

Ach! I give up.

Thirty Days of Night

Posted on by Neal Asher

I read the Twilight series and I enjoyed it. Even though there are those reading those words who will sneer, I write them because long ago I decided I would not go the route of the literary snob or the pretentious twits who choose to associate themselves with books and films they feel enhance their literary cred. I chose to be honest about my likes and dislikes. I don’t like lies.

I also enjoy films like Interview with a Vampire and From Dusk Till Dawn because I love the ideas of immortality and the superhuman, especially with the added spice of those concerned being somewhat amoral, or immoral. Until now, my favourite vampire has always been Mr Barlow from the film of Salem’s Lot – the scene locked in my mind being the one where we first see him in a prison cell – but now he’s been knocked into second place.

Last night I watched Thirty Days of Night which in atmosphere was a bit like John Carpenter’s The Thing, what with the dogs, the cold and the desperation. It’s set in a small Alaskan town in the dead of winter, when they lose the sun for a month. It’s a town that gets cut off from the rest of the world. It becomes a feeding ground, and there you’ll find the best vampires ever, but not in a good way. If you want an antidote to the pretty, angst-ridden vampires of recent times, get this film and watch it.

Outcasts.

Posted on by Neal Asher

So, the BBC is starting a major new drama series.

Set in space with the future of earth looking increasingly precarious, the race is on in Outcasts to find an alternative home in the universe.

Apparently, to get to this alternative home the outcasts travel through some kind of tranporter, but,

Outcasts is a tense and fast-paced series about co-operation and conflict, idealism and power, sexual competition and love. Most of all it is about our life’s big imperatives – cheating death, seeking suitable mates and surviving as a species.

And it is definitely not science fiction. According to the designer, James North, who previously spent 5 years designing sets for Dr Who, ‘…the BBC doesn’t want to give the impression it’s putting out a sci-fi show on prime-time BBC1. This is a futuristic drama with the focus on pioneering humans who, out of necessity, just happen to be living on a planet that is not Earth.’

Let me give my deeply considered opinion on the above statement: what a wanker.

The Wire

Posted on by Neal Asher

Oh dear, what a disappointment. We’ve watched about four episodes of The Wire so far and, since seasons 2, 3, 4 & 5 of The Shield are on their way to us, I doubt we’ll be watching any more. The first episode was a chaotic mess but we stuck with it in the hope of improvement and did begin to get a handle on what was going on, but that chaos was but a minor problem amidst many larger ones.

Let’s start with the language of this, which is a big downside for the English viewer. Not only is American English sometimes difficult (how often have I given up on the mumblings of Brad Pitt) but the gang and police slang in this is nigh incomprehensible. It took me three episodes to realize they were saying ‘terraces’ and not ‘terrorists’, and generally I understood about half of what was said.

The next problem is that if I’d wanted to watch a show that was 80% office politics I wouldn’t have bought a cop show. Frankly it is fucking boring. The paper shuffling and dick waving contests of bureaucrats is not something I find entertaining. It’s depressing.

Then there are the characters. Okay, if there was just one person here who I was pulling for, that might have made a difference. However, they are all wounded, damaged screw-ups, all detestable twats, and if someone were to napalm the lot of them I’d shrug and actually consider watching the next episode. I’m guessing this is all supposed to be realistic depiction of life on the street, man, right-on with the social ‘issues’ etc. If I want realism I watch a documentary.

In The Shield I had identified and had some empathy for every major character within the first episode, which was an entertaining story in itself. Four episodes of The Wire have left me annoyed at having taken any notice of the hype, wishing I could get my money back, and considering whether to bother handing it in to a charity shop or binning it. Life is too short for shit, really.

BBC Biased.

Posted on by Neal Asher

Gosh, I’m so surprised about this article from Peter Sissons. There was me thinking the BBC was the home of unbiased reporting and excellence…

Peter Sissons tell us:
By far the most popular and widely read newspapers at the BBC are The Guardian and The Independent. ­Producers refer to them routinely for the line to take on ­running stories, and for inspiration on which items to cover. In the later stages of my career, I lost count of the number of times I asked a producer for a brief on a story, only to be handed a copy of The Guardian and told ‘it’s all in there’.

If you want to read one of the few copies of the Daily Mail that find their way into the BBC newsroom, they are difficult to track down, and you would be advised not to make too much of a show of reading them. Wrap them in brown paper or a copy of The Guardian, would be my advice.
…
Whatever the United Nations is associated with is good — it is heresy to question any of its activities. The EU is also a good thing, but not quite as good as the UN. Soaking the rich is good, despite well-founded economic arguments that the more you tax, the less you get. And Government spending is a good thing, although most BBC ­people prefer to call it investment, in line with New Labour’s terminology.
…
All green and environmental groups are very good things. Al Gore is a saint. George Bush was a bad thing, and thick into the bargain. Obama was not just the Democratic Party’s candidate for the White House, he was the BBC’s. Blair was good, Brown bad, but the BBC has now lost interest in both.
…
But whatever your talent, sex or ethnicity, there’s one sure-fire way at a BBC promotions board to ensure you don’t get the job, indeed to bring your career to a grinding halt. And that’s if, when asked which post-war politician you most admire, you reply: ‘Margaret Thatcher’.

Congruence.

Posted on by Neal Asher

You know I got this really odd feeling whilst I watched the film Lemony Snicket (which came out in 2004) upon viewing the scene with the leeches. My initial reaction was, did the film-makers read The Skinner, which was published in 2002? I mean, the boat, the sea, water you just can’t swim in, carnivorous leeches? Well, no, because the book in A Series of Unfortunate Events that has the leeches in it, called The Wide Window, was published in 2000. The congruence of some ideas amidst writers can sometimes be quite astounding, and I think it all comes about because though people might be writing something they think of as new, they are all always standing on the shoulders of giants (especially in SFF), who are the source of their inspiration.

Recently, whilst sitting down to watch the fourth season of Primeval, I realized I’d missed Season Three so bought a box set of One, Two & Three. I didn’t know what Season Three was about but, catching a hint of the storyline (not sure where) I looked up a review of it and got a feeling similar to that I experienced while watching the leech scene in Lemony Snicket:

…you can really see where most of the budget of the series went as Conner, Danny and Abby jump from anomaly to anomaly following Helen through a series of times, encountering creatures and dinosaurs in each time period they visit…

Eventually tracking Helen down, the team confronts her and finds out that her plan is a lot more insane than first thought. Having figured out what the artefact is and what it does (it’s a sort of future hard drive for anomalies), it’s then revealed that it can be used to go back to a specific point in time, namely 333 (a specific code used by archaeologists when describing the first ‘dig’ where hominids – or proto-humans – were found). The team find that it’s Helen’s intent to go back to the site in Rift Valley and poison the first settlement of hominids, which would mean that humans would not evolve and as such never exist.

Did the writers of Primeval read Cowl? If they were into time-travel it would have been an good choice since there aren’t many modern time-travel books out there and it was shortlisted for the PKD Award.

But no, I think not. It’s that congruence again showing us that there’s nothing new under the sun. The idea in Primeval was just putting a spin on and ramping up of the idea implicit in the time-travel paradox of, ‘What happen if I go back in time and shoot my grandfather?’ which is what I did in Cowl. Though I must admit the future monster on this car could (at a big stretch) be Cowl himself!

Queensland Floods.

Posted on by Neal Asher

Because, apparently, Australia would be subject to increasing global warming drought, damming projects in Queensland were shelved and desalination plants built instead (now mothballed). This is a matter of record and a source of anger for many residents there. Also, it’s not a great idea to build on flood plains. However, the usual suspects are claiming this one for ‘catastrophic climate change’ and, as is usual, their grasp of history is about as firm as chocolate pliers.

1841
17th January: Highest flood on record, occurred at Brisbane and Ipswich.

1844
10th January: Heavy floods at Ipswich.

1845
17th December: Flood at Ipswich.

1852
11th April: Heavy floods at Brisbane and Ipswich.

1857
19th and 20th May: Great floods at Ipswich and Brisbane; river at Ipswich rose 45 feet, and at Brisbane 12 feet.

The above is just a small sample. If you go and check here at ‘Queensland Flood History’ you’ll discover enough to boggle the mind. This has fuck all to do with ‘catastrophic climate change’.

Audio Books

Posted on by Neal Asher

They’re not up yet. I’m told:
                  

I’m sorry to say that although we planned that your series would be live tomorrow it appears there was some glitch in the upload on the US side. We have tagged this as ‘urgent’ for them, and they have promised to try and get it live by Friday. As soon as we release it we will promote it in all our social media channels. Also, if you’d like, we can provide a trackable link to the product page for the series for your blog.

In further news, look who’s narrated the three books: William Gaminara.

Before joining the cast of Silent Witness, William’s last major role was as Will in the dot com drama Attachments.

His other TV credits include The Law, People Like Us, Hope and Glory, and Dangerfield.

William played Dr. Richard Locke in the BBC Radio 4 drama The Archers. He previously starred as Casualty’s Dr Andrew Bower between 1989 and 1992, a character that returned in 2000 with Philip Bretherton in the role. William’s also played a doctor in The Bill.

As well as acting, William is an accomplished writer. His work includes episodes of This Life and The Lakes, and he recently adapted Ella and the Mothers for TV from Rachel Morris’ novel.

The Voyage of the Dawn Treader

Posted on by Neal Asher

You can probably guess the impression the book of this made upon me when you consider the name of Ambel’s ship in The Skinner. I called it the Treader, because that seemed like a good name for a somewhat weird ship undergoing a weird journey and, remember, Ambel’s ship even had a talking animal aboard…

However, if we are to judge by the way the last two books have been portrayed in film, I was missing the somewhat unsubtle message and the indoctrination bounced off my thick skin. When I read the books as a youngster I enjoyed the magic, swords, talking animals and not for one second did I think that I had ‘nothing without belief’ or that I had to ‘have faith’, nor did I notice that in our reality Aslan went under a different name. Even then I was realizing that suspension of disbelief was what I wanted, between the covers of a book.

The film was visually gorgeous and I would have enjoyed it immensely but for those two comments above dropped in like a roast pig in a mosque. From the first of them it lost me and I was sitting there with a bit of a sneer on my face, which became more pronounced at the end with all that Aslan’s kingdom nonsense.

Where the books so unsubtle? I don’t remember, maybe because as a youngster, having been brought up in an agnostic then firmly atheist household, I was making no connections at all. If they were then I find it surprising that my mother, a school teacher, used to read them to the kids at her school. One would suppose that they were, since in his other works C. S. Lewis was loudly banging his tambourine and arguing for belief, for faith. Or is it the case that those making these films too firmly bought into the idea of the Narnia books as a Christian allegory?

Where the books this loaded with doctrinal cudgels? Or were the products of this member of the Inklings not quite so consciously didactic? I don’t remember being quite so annoyed by the first film, The Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe. Different directors, producers?

The Shield

Posted on by Neal Asher

With our relocation to Crete for a large portion of the year we decided that paying for Sky all year just for the five months during which we would watch it was a waste of money. Better, we felt, to spend the money on DVDs which could be watched at both locations. In fact, comparing DVD prices to a TV subscription is something many should consider if they feel they need to make savings, especially when taking into consideration how many programs you can get hold of with freeview or freesat now. £20+ a month can buy a lot of DVDs…

So, I’ve been reading reviews, checking the sites that sell DVDs — generally seeing what might be available and worth watching. I’ve heard a lot about The Wire and The Shield so I bought the first seasons of those at £12.89 and £8.49 respectively. I’m presently enjoying Primeval but didn’t get to see the last series, so bought all the first three seasons for £15.93.

We’ve just started watching The Shield, in fact watched the first three episodes in one evening, and it is very enjoyable. This is great because there are 8 seasons for us to see. We’ll be giving The Wire a go next. Suggestions on anything else worthwhile are all welcome!